I Didn’t Ask For Villain’s Obsession! Chapter 36

Chapter 36. It Was the First Time

Before my eyes stretched a vast, pitch-black darkness.

My consciousness sank into an empty, murky abyss—like a deep swamp.

I drifted in a place where dreams and illusions blurred with reality and delusions.

I wanted to open my eyes, but they wouldn’t budge.

My entire body felt rigid, as if frozen, unable to move a single finger.

How did this happen?

Ah, that’s right.

I collapsed during the trial.

Someone must have laid me on a bed.

I could feel the warmth of the blanket wrapped around my body.

How did the trial end?

The people who slandered and accused me—what expressions must they be wearing now?

The maids…?

I hoped they weren’t too frightened.

Cedric must have anticipated this outcome, so he probably wasn’t too shaken, but the others…

Perhaps I should have given Countess Chloe a heads-up.

A flood of thoughts ran through my mind.

Ah! Now that I think about it—

I suddenly recalled the last thing I saw before I fainted.

Though my vision had been blurry from dizziness…

I think I saw Jerome looking startled.

Heh.

The thought alone lifted my mood.

If I could move, my lips would undoubtedly be curled into a smug grin.

I should have observed his shocked face more closely.

When else would I get the chance to see such a composed and cold man look so flustered?

I regretted not recording it.

Just as I was inwardly lamenting—

“Her Majesty… She hasn’t woken up yet, has she?”

“No, not yet.”

I heard hushed voices whispering.

Though my consciousness hovered between dream and reality, my hearing was still intact.

Their hushed conversations reached me clearly.

“I can’t believe Her Majesty is in such pain. If only I had been more helpful…”

A sniffle accompanied the voice.

It was Marie.

No, Marie.

Don’t cry.

I wanted to sit up and comfort her right away.

But my body refused to cooperate.

“Don’t cry, Lady Marie.”

“That’s right. You did everything you could.”

Countess Chloe and the other maids consoled her.

Yes, just as they said, Marie had done well.

That night, when Countess Chloe’s remarkable acting shone,

I had entrusted Marie with a letter.

A letter addressed to Cedric.

It was a precaution—a final card to play.

Of course, Marie didn’t know what was written in it.

She had only delivered it.

That must be why she’s crying.

She had no idea why I had collapsed—no idea how I had been poisoned.

Should I have told her in advance?

I had considered it.

But after weighing the situation, I decided it was better not to.

Still, it seemed I had made her worry needlessly.

This dream feels oddly real.

Normally, people pinch themselves in these situations to check if they’re dreaming.

Not that I could move a finger even if I tried.

“Don’t worry. The magician said Her Majesty will be fine. She just needs rest, and she will wake up soon.”

“Yes. The Guardian of Verdure himself treated her, so she will surely recover.”

“It was such a relief that he happened to have an antidote with him.”

“He said he had prepared it for Her Highness the Imperial Consort, didn’t he? It’s as if the gods were watching over Her Majesty.”

The antidote.

The maids believed Cedric had simply happened to have it.

But that wasn’t the case.

He had the antidote because he was the one who made the poison.

Yes, all of this had been part of my and Cedric’s plan.

With the Imperial Consort poisoned and me accused as the culprit,

I knew that no amount of pleading would clear me of suspicion.

Even with solid proof, doubts would remain.

I needed something irrefutable.

Something that would instantly erase all suspicions.

So, I decided to poison myself—with the same poison used on the Imperial Consort.

No one, no matter how skeptical, could claim the culprit was someone suffering from the very same poison.

Thus, the scheme was set in motion.

And for it to work, I needed an expert in poisons.

That person was Cedric.

A brilliant magician and the Guardian of Verdure, known for his expertise in plants and toxins.

When I first asked him to make Rosaflo poison, he refused outright.

— No poison in this world comes without consequences. And a poison that causes infertility? I fear divine punishment.

Cedric had visited me late at night after receiving Marie’s letter, shaking his head in distress.

I pleaded with him.

— If no poison exists without side effects, then create one. If that’s impossible, then make a perfect antidote instead.

— If I make even the slightest mistake, Your Majesty…

— It’s fine, Cedric. I trust you.

In the end, he relented.

He crafted a special poison just for me—

The same Rosaflo poison that had afflicted the Imperial Consort.

But with one crucial difference.

Through meticulous refinement, he had removed all harmful aftereffects.

The symptoms would be identical, but there would be no lasting damage.

The night before the trial, Cedric visited me again.

He handed me the poison and issued a warning.

— You may experience unbearable pain. Pain so excruciating that death might seem preferable. Are you sure you’re prepared?

I had smiled brightly and nodded.

Pain didn’t matter.

If it meant proving my innocence, I would endure anything.

Of course, Cedric had tried to stop me.

— Your Majesty, I don’t think this is right.

Just as I was about to drink the poison, he hesitated.

— I’ll come up with another way. This plan…

His face had been grim that night.

He must have been worried for me.

— It’s fine.

I had smiled to reassure him.

— I’ll be okay, Cedric.

— ……

— This is the best plan we have.

And so, I drank the poison.

Then, as planned, on the day of the trial—

I collapsed before everyone’s eyes.

As if someone had poisoned me.

I needed to thank him.

To tell him he had done well.

A person suddenly came to mind.

Did he return?

The other person I had asked for help.

I had asked him to find Roisen.

I had already heard about her fate in the courtroom from the inquisitor.

She had been found cold and lifeless.

I would have to meet him in person.

There was much to do once I woke up.

“We should leave now.”

“Yes, so Her Majesty can rest properly.”

Click.

The door closed.

The voices of the maids faded into silence.

***

My consciousness remained hazy.

It felt like my body was floating.

Meanwhile, I had many strange dreams.

At one point, I felt an icy wind sweep in from somewhere.

Was a window left open?

A faint floral scent lingered at the tip of my nose.

A pleasant fragrance that made my heart flutter.

Why is this dream so vivid?

I marveled at my own imagination.

“…Your Majesty.”

Hmm?

A faint voice murmured.

Someone was whispering something.

“…I’m sorry.”

Apologizing?

The voice sounded familiar.

Who is it?

Why was someone apologizing to me?

I couldn’t tell.

The voice was too soft to make out clearly.

I wanted to open my eyes.

To see who it was.

But no matter how hard I tried, my tightly shut eyes wouldn’t budge.

When will I finally be able to move?

It was frustrating not being able to move my own body.

And my strange dream didn’t end there.

First, I heard the sound of a door opening.

Step. Step.

Footsteps approached.

Someone was near.

A maid?

Had they come to check on me?

If they spoke, I would know who it was.

But no voice followed.

Whoever it was merely lingered beside me, then disappeared out the door.

What kind of dream is this?

I had several more dreams like that.

My head ached again.

And then, I lost consciousness once more.

***

How much time had passed?

A warm sensation on my hand pulled me back.

“Ugh…”

I stirred.

A lingering heaviness weighed on my body.

I blinked slowly.

The window outside was dark.

It must be nighttime.

“Ugh… I’m thirsty…”

Lying in bed for so long had made my throat dry.

Just then, a cup of water appeared before me.

A maid must have been nearby.

How thoughtful.

“Thank you.”

My voice came out hoarse.

I naturally accepted the cup and drank.

Ah, I feel alive again.

“Your Majesty.”

A voice called out to me.

“…?”

Strange.

Since when did my maids have such deep voices?

Wait.

The warmth in my other hand—

Someone was holding it tightly.

I must be too disoriented to notice earlier.

I turned my head.

“…Huh?”

My eyes widened.

It wasn’t a maid.

“…Sir Leonard?”

The person who had handed me the water—

Was none other than Leonard.

He must have returned while I was unconscious.

Having completed the task I had given him.

I welcomed him with a smile.

“You’re back. I heard about Roisen. Thank you for—”

“Your Majesty.”

Leonard interrupted.

“This was reckless.”

His voice was strained.

“Why did you do it?”

No.

He sounded slightly angry.

“Was it because you thought I wouldn’t be able to handle things properly? Is that why you resorted to such drastic measures?”

Drastic measures.

Even before I could explain, he had already figured it out.

He knew I had poisoned myself.

“That’s not it.”

I shook my head.

“I knew you would handle it well. I trusted you, which is why I asked you for help.”

“……”

“And I did what I had to do.”

I smiled softly.

“I couldn’t just sit back and rely on you for everything, could I?”

Leonard remained silent.

Was he that shocked?

I hadn’t told him about this plan.

He must have been caught off guard.

“I must have worried you. I’m sorry. I should have told you beforehand.”

“I came to see you the moment I returned.”

His voice was low, barely above a whisper.

“You were lying there, pale as death.”

I said nothing.

I simply stared at him, waiting for him to continue.

“I have witnessed countless deaths.”

His grip on my hand tightened.

“When comrades died on the battlefield, I felt nothing. Because that was simply how war worked. But…”

He took a deep breath before speaking again.

“This was the first time.”

His deep blue eyes darkened—like the depths of the ocean.

Gazing at me, as if I was the only thing reflected in them.

That night.

Under the soft moonlight.

He confessed.

“For the first time, I felt fear—

Because I was afraid of losing someone.”

—

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